Obituary of Gail M Smith

Gail Marie Smith (formerly O’Connor, maiden name Mitchell) passed peacefully in Iowa City, Iowa, on Thursday, April 30, 2026. The many chapters of her life live on in the memories of her as a mother, grandmother, great-grandmother, sister, cousin, aunt, and friend.

Gail was preceded in death by her parents, Connie and Guy, and her brother, Mike. She is survived by her two daughters, Cynthia and Jessica; her grandchildren, Brittany, Alex, Nick, and Sage; her great-grandchildren, Owen, Caleb, Judah, and Isla; her sister, Sheri; and her nieces and nephews, Jeff, Mandy, Erin, Christopher, Jacqueline, Robin, and Sarah.

On November 8, 1952, Gail was born in Honolulu, Hawaii, while her father was stationed there with the Coast Guard. Gail’s mother sent a postcard home announcing the birth of her first-born daughter during a powerful storm with gale-force winds, inspiring the name she would carry throughout her life.

In time, the Mitchell family grew to have three children: Gail, Mike, and Sheri. As a military family, they moved often, living in Hawaii, Massachusetts, Hawaii again, Virginia, California, New York, and Nebraska. Notably, as a girl, Gail lived on Governor’s Island in New York, taking a ferry and then a bus to school into the city each day. Even as a youngster, she was an avid and endlessly curious reader whose appetite for books often outpaced classroom curriculum. Gail told stories of occasionally skipping school, not out of mischief, but to spend the day tucked away in the public library, immersing herself in a world of books that exceeded her access at school. She’d always make it back in time to the bus, though, to catch that ferry home.

Gail came of age during the height of the Civil Rights Movement, with New York City alive in protest, music, debate, and social change. From the windows of her military school bus, she watched crowds of anti-war demonstrators, free spirits, artists, and activists filling the streets with ideas about peace, equality, and expansion of mind. She was deeply drawn to their energy and convictions, yet as the daughter of a Coast Guardsman, she also understood the pride and sacrifice of military life and at times felt caught between those worlds. It was a tension she carried thoughtfully, believing there could be more understanding on both sides while still advocating for compassion, progress, and change from within the position she occupied, and always secretly wishing she could join the “hippies.”

As a teenager in Omaha, Nebraska, Gail graduated from Marion High School in 1971. Her parents chose to send her to an all-girls religious school instead of the local public school attended by her beloved cousin Pam. Gail never forgot it, and would remember the disappointment with humor and affection, “I wanted so badly to be a ‘Benson Bunny’ and to be with my cousin Pam!” Pam remembers Gail as kind, quiet, witty, and deeply loyal—someone with whom secrets could always be shared and who could pick up a conversation as if no time had passed at all. Their bond remained one of the constants of Gail’s life, and one she spoke of often through the years.

After high school, Gail married Patrick O’Connor and welcomed her first daughter, Cynthia, in Omaha on April 6, 1972. During Gail’s pregnancy, Pat joined the Army, and shortly after Cindy’s birth, Gail made the difficult decision to enlist as well. Away at basic training for six weeks, she missed her new baby terribly. Notes and signatures on the back of the group photo from her basic training graduation by the women she trained alongside spoke of Gail’s kindness, her beautiful singing voice, and their excitement for her much anticipated reunion with her baby daughter. Soon after, Gail was reunited with Cindy and joined Pat in Honolulu where they were stationed, returning to Hawaii once again, where her own story had first begun.

During her time in service, Gail trained and served as a specialist word processor. Pat remembered her as kind and something of a quiet trailblazer, advocating for policy changes within the military as the first woman to navigate two roles simultaneously: a dependent as the wife of an Army serviceman and mother of his daughter, and as a service member in her own right. After two years of service, the end of her marriage, and a period of transition, Gail was honorably discharged in 1975.

Before leaving Hawaii for the third and final time, Gail met Gene Smith, who would become her long-time life partner. Their relationship grew over the years before they eventually married, which would bring another new chapter in Gail’s life, and the last name, Smith.

Gail’s nephew, Jeff, remembers a visit from his Aunt Gail, Gene, and cousin Cindy to Montana when he was just a boy. During that trip, while gathered at the home of longtime family friends of Gail’s parents, the Cudneys, Gail and Gene decided to marry in the backyard after many years together—a memory that remained special to Jeff. He remembers his Aunt Gail as endlessly fun, always willing to play board games with him and Cindy, and as someone who was “smart, funny, and always happy.”

Gail, Gene, and Cindy lived in Long Beach, California. Gail took some college courses and spent several years working in aerospace technology, and as a Smith, her family doubled in size. Big gatherings for backyard barbecues, pool parties, intense games of Scrabble, and time spent together doing crafts became part of the fabric of those years. Her sister-in-law Jackie remembers her as “truly the sweetest, kindest, smartest, and cutest person I’ve ever known,” adding “we were lucky to have known her.” Gail’s nephew, Chris, remembers his Aunt Gail fondly from childhood, describing her as consistently kind and thoughtful, always taking time for meaningful conversation whenever they were together.

On January 24, 1987, Gail welcomed her second daughter, Jessica, with Gene in Bellflower, California. Cindy was 15 years old at the time and played a loving role in helping raise her younger sister alongside their mother. As Jessica grew up, so did Cindy, and Gail soon embraced new roles as a mother-in-law to Allan and grandmother to Brittany, Alex, and Nick.

Following her second and final divorce, Gail lived in Riverside, California, where she continued to raise Jessica and focused on a career at the University of California, Riverside, in the Office of the Dean of Agriculture. There, she put her military-trained word processing and publishing skills to work helping bring agricultural research and academic publications to life. Gail often brought Jessica to campus with her; to the botanical gardens, the arboretum, and Take Your Daughter to Work Day naturalist activities at the university—experiences that would later inspire Jessica’s own fields of study and career.

Gail worked tirelessly and took great pride in her work at UCR. When the opportunity arose to return to Omaha to be closer to her family, including Cindy and her growing family who had since moved to Nebraska, Gail was overjoyed. Upon her departure in 1997, the Dean’s Office honored her with a certificate of appreciation. It reads:

“In appreciation for your dedicated service to the Dean’s Office, College of Natural Agricultural Sciences, from May 21, 1990 to July 31, 1997. You often went beyond the call of duty, staying late at night or coming in on weekends, for jobs big and small. Your expertise in word processing and desktop publishing has been appreciated by the many people with whom you have worked. Your quick wit and warm, sunny smile will be deeply missed. The Staff of the CNAS Dean’s Office wish you much success in your new endeavors.”

Back in Omaha, Gail was finally able to be close again with the people she loved most: both daughters, her grandchildren, her mother, siblings, nieces, cousins, and extended family. After so many years shaped by distance and moving from place to place, she treasured the chance to build everyday memories together. Whether through visits, long conversations, holidays, or simply being nearby, Gail deeply valued the closeness of her family and the bonds that rooted her in life. She spent Saturday and Sunday mornings at her mothers with family, drinking coffee with the newspaper and chatting in the garden her mother Connie had perfected. She celebrated Husker football with family, and loved to hoot and holler at the games. She loved Halloween when she would dress up each year as a witch with all the women in her family in their own little “coven,” a delightful terror to the neighborhood children. Gail made up for lost time.

Her sister, Sheri, remembers Gail as her first best friend and protector growing up, especially from their older brother, Mike, who could be a pest to the sisters. Moving so often as children of a serviceman, Sheri only felt a sense of home because she and Gail were together. As adults, Gail remained a loving sister and aunt who treated Sheri’s children as her own. Her generosity became something of a family trademark—if someone moved into a new home or was going through a difficult time, Gail likely already had a thoughtful gift waiting somewhere in her famously messy car. Sheri especially marveled at Gail’s intelligence, remembering, “We would play trivia games and I would be flabbergasted at how much she knew.” More than anything, Sheri treasured having Gail back in Nebraska again when she returned from California. Even late in life, Gail remained a source of comfort and understanding for Sheri: steady, loving, and always there when her family needed her most.

Gail’s niece, Robin, remembers her aunt as someone who always held a special place in her heart; thoughtful, caring, and endlessly supportive through every stage of life. After Robin’s parents divorced and Mike moved in with her grandmother and Gail, Gail helped care for the family and made difficult times feel lighter. Robin especially remembered proudly accompanying Gail to work one day for a school program, delighted by the small but important job of sealing envelopes in her office. Years later, when Robin’s father became ill and eventually passed, Gail again stepped in with quiet steadiness and compassion, helping a young Robin navigate burial arrangements and costs when she felt overwhelmed and alone. Gail told her daughters she needed to be there for Mike’s girls no matter what and it was what her mother would have wanted for her son. Robin remained deeply grateful for that kindness. Even as life grew busier with children and years passed, Robin remembers her Aunt Gail continued cheering her family on from afar, faithfully following their lives and leaving words of encouragement wherever she could.

In 2001, Gail and Cindy moved in together, creating a lively multigenerational household where Jessica, Alex, and Nick could be raised surrounded by family. This became one of the most joyful and grounding chapters of Gail’s life. As a grandmother, she was deeply present, woven into the everyday rhythms of homework, football games, school activities, movie nights, proms, and the beautiful chaos of a full home. Gail treasured the rare gift of watching both of her daughters navigate important chapters of their lives while also helping raise the next generation alongside them.

The home also became a gathering place that reflected the lasting and evolving ties of family. Over the years, Cindy’s father and Gail’s first husband, Pat, would visit the home with his then wife Val, now sharing grandchildren with Gail. She loved to joke that one of her favorite parts of Christmas had become being served an omelet on Christmas morning by her ex-husband—a detail that perfectly captured her humor and the way love, history, and family remained deeply intertwined throughout her life.

Gail was an especially devoted grandmother to Alex and Nick, who knew her lovingly as “GiGi,” a nickname she coined herself on a video game she played with the boys. Ever present in their lives, but especially close during their years living together, GiGi believed the best way to love someone was to take genuine interest in what mattered to them. Whether it was sports, chess, video games, or any time spent together, she was always eager to learn more so she could fully join in their world. She showed up consistently, attended every game and performance, making her grandsons feel deeply seen, supported, and celebrated. More than anything, Alex and Nick knew GiGi as someone who delighted in them completely and loved them unconditionally.

Cindy and Gail entered a shared chapter of life as empty nesters around the same time, a time Cindy remembers fondly. With Nick in his senior year of high school, they continued attending all of his football games side by side, while also embracing a more active and social rhythm of their own. They did a couple of 5Ks together, took part in the Annual First National Trek Up the Tower at First National Bank (climbing 40 floors and 870 stairs!), and regularly attended water aerobics every Saturday with girlfriends. They went to baseball games, raised puppies, and took the dogs swimming at the lake, filling their days with companionship and little adventures. Cindy remembers a trip to Las Vegas for her 40th birthday with Gail and a large group, where they rented dune buggies and drove out into the desert, an experience she recalls as one of the times she laughed the hardest with her mother.

All the special events of the many growing children in her life were important to Gail. As the years passed, those milestones evolved from high school graduations to Navy boot camp or college graduations, and eventually weddings. She was heartened to travel to Las Vegas for Nick and Alexis’s wedding, and later to California for Brittany and Levi’s, each celebration marking not just an event, but the passage of time and the continued growth of a family she remained closely and proudly connected to.

Gail worked at Bank of the West around this time. She was deeply loved by her coworkers, with whom she formed a close-knit team that felt more like family than colleagues. At work, she continued her tradition of dressing as a witch for Halloween (same costume, after all those years!), bringing her signature humor and spirit into the office. She carried out her beloved Christmas hat tradition there, wearing a different festive hat each day of December and displaying them across her cubicle by day’s end until it was completely filled with holiday cheer.

In time, Gail retired and moved to Iowa City, Iowa, not long after becoming a grandmother again, this time to Jessica’s son, Sage. Once again, she stepped into that role with ease and joy, offering a steady presence and genuine delight in Sage’s upbringing. She took a deep interest in whatever captured his imagination, be it drawing, chess, reading, animals, or video games; she’d learn right alongside him so they could share it together. GiGi always kept a full candy jar and something special waiting for Sage when he visited, small traditions that quickly became treasured rituals and deepened the bond between her and Jessica as well. When asked what one word he would use to describe GiGi, Sage chose: “kind.”

Gail could hardly believe she was living through a global pandemic when it arrived. Newly settled in her home in Iowa City and in a higher-risk health category, she isolated carefully, saying, “Well, this was not what I’d planned for my retirement.” Jessica and Sage would visit, and Gail found creative ways to stay close despite the distance, placing special toys on the patio, setting up a sandbox for Sage so they could play while separated by the screen, and writing messages or drawing cheerful pictures on the sliding glass door for him to see.

During this time of isolation, Gail also joined a virtual art class led by a family friend, Ramona, where she discovered a new creative outlet and created beautiful artwork she proudly saved. Ramona remembers Gail as a “warm and beautiful human” whose smile lit up every space she entered, even through a screen, and shared, “She was one of those supportive people who made me feel loved even from afar, such a cheerleader and a loving woman.”

As the world began to reopen and life eased back into rhythm, new joys arrived. Gail was deeply delighted by the births of her great-grandsons, Owen and then Caleb. She embraced becoming a great-grandmother with the same joy and excitement that defined every chapter of her family life, cherishing each new milestone, photograph, and story shared about the boys.

In Gail’s later years, she faced health challenges, but she never lost her warmth, humor, or enduring optimism. She’d talk almost daily with Cindy on the phone, she befriended many in her area, and she kept current with all her friends and family online. Jessica accompanied her to countless doctor appointments, pushing wheelchairs, carrying oxygen tanks, and helping navigate the difficulties of daily life, yet the two managed to meet even the hardest days with laughter. They developed their own language of humor and care. Jessica would mischievously push Gail’s wheelchair a little too fast, calling out “wheee!” or asserting to passersby, “beep! Beep! Coming through!” and generally making a scene just to hear her mother laugh. Determined to make things easier for Gail during outings, Jessica would sometimes pull the car directly up to doors and even onto lawns and sidewalks where no car reasonably belonged. Gail, amused every time, would smile and say, “Now that’s service.”

In retirement, Gail finally achieved a pace she had long deserved: slower, gentler, lived by her own rules, and relaxed. She completed hundreds of jigsaw puzzles, listened to all kinds of music (loudly!), and slept in whenever she pleased. Gail enjoyed birdwatching, luring a variety of birds right to her patio with endless delivery orders of birdseed.

In the last year of her life, Gail kept a handwritten list of birds tucked within arm's reach of her chair in the living room from where she spotted them: a hummingbird, a wren, mourning dove, woodpecker, bluejay, cardinal, robin, sparrow, house finch, purple finch, junco, chickadee, crow, pelican, cooper’s hawk, red tailed hawk, owl (she messaged Cindy at 3:00 a.m. with a photo of the owl!).

Cindy and Jessica were together, hand in hand with each other and their mother in her final moments. Gail was peaceful, and the room was filled with love, tenderness, and gratitude for a life so fully lived. In the days that followed, the sisters spent hours remembering stories about their mother and sorting through thousands of photographs spanning the many chapters of Gail’s long and richly lived life. Messages and memories poured in from family and friends, each carrying their own special story about Gail, yet nearly all arrived at the same word to describe her: kind. Gail was deeply, unmistakably kind.

Gail wished to be cremated, with her ashes placed within a sundial to be installed at the Westlawn-Hillcrest Memorial Park in Omaha, Nebraska beneath a large tree, near where her mother, Connie, rests within a birdbath memorial and where her brother, Mike, is also remembered. Cindy and Jessica invite all who knew and loved Gail to join them for a Celebration of Life at VFW (post 2543) in Plattsmouth, Nebraska on Saturday, May 23, 2026 from 2:00-4:00 pm. When Gail’s sundial is completed and placed, family and loved ones will also be invited to gather for the interment of her ashes.  

Her daughters hope that those who read this will carry a little of Gail forward in their everyday lives: try something new, slow down, feed the birds, leave that mess for later and read a good book (perhaps some societal sci-fi or smutty romance in Gail’s honor), save your photographs, dress up on holidays, sing loudly along to music in the car, and spend time working on a puzzle. Above all, speak kindly to others, and especially to yourself.

“Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken,” she’d say.